Are you consistently at war against well.. yourself? You have a plan to make your new habits sustainable, but then…
You keep making plans to “Start Monday”, but Monday never really comes. we’re going to be talking about the truth of what’s actually going on inside of your brain that makes those new habits so slippery and the old ones stuck like glue.
“Some people spend their entire lives waiting for the time to be right to make an improvement.”
– James Clear
This may seem familiar…
It’s after dinner and you know you don’t actually want to eat 5 Kit-Kats– yet there you are, stuffing the wrappers under the rest of the garbage so no one else will see them.
You know you feel 10x better when you get in a morning work out– but you lay in bed talking yourself out of it instead.
You know you can’t stand how much tie you spend on your phone– but the pull of Insta is so strong- even if you get stuck in the scroll trap.
You know you’ve done this before.
Related: How to know if you’re a stressed out sugar burner
“The first mistake is never the one that ruins you. It is the spiral of repeated mistakes that follows. Missing once is an accident. Missing twice is the start of a new habit.”
– James Clear
How to get out of these old habits
Step 1, for creating new habits is a plan- of course. But, you’ve probably already made 100 plans. So a lack of a plan is not the problem- is it?
How do you change course when you’re standing in your own way- again?
How can you fight yourself when your enemy knows so much about you– including all of your weaknesses?
There are two sides of your brain- each with their own set of interests. When you can dissect these two sides and see them as they truly are- you can DECIDE which one to listen to- and not default to whoever is the loudest.
This results in you taking either action or inaction in line with what your true self truly wants or needs.
Your HIGHER brain VS your PRIMITIVE brain
Your higher brain is in the prefrontal cortex where your actual thinking comes from- this is your decision maker.
Your primitive brain is your survival brain. This part of your brain works tirelessly to keep you safe, alive, and breathing.
Your primitive brain’s motivators + goals
- Avoid pain
- Seek pleasure
- Conserve energy
This side of your brain is getting you to seek:
- Warmth
- Connection
- Happiness
At the root of all this is dopamine– because we want to feel good.
However, this side of your brain does not execute, it doesn’t actually make the decision. It may influence a decision, or suggest an idea- but it does not pull the trigger. That is the work of your higher brain- and your higher brain is responsible for breaking old habits.
The only thing that will override our desire for comfort (survival) is the desire for what our higher brain wants more.
Your higher brain’s motivators and goals
- Plans for your future self
- Seeks growth and development
- Has your own deep desires in mind
- Looks for long term pleasure
- Committed, makes decisions
Related: How to eliminate decision fatigue
Both sides of the brain are equally important, yet they do NOT have the same motivators and goals.
For example, your higher brain knows your afternoon walk helps to ground you and you will get Vitamin D exposure from going outside.
Your higher brain knows future you want the habit of staying active, that it improves your mood, and knows that your dog will be more relaxed this evening when it’s time to settle in.
Your primitive brain reminds you that it is cold out, that you have household work to auto-pilot through, that you skipped walking 3x last week already, and everything was fine.
When you can decipher the two sides you can hear your higher brain more clearly.
Your primitive brain is very augmentative.
I’ve found most people find it easier to simply not give it a chance to speak. Turn into a robot, and stick to your commitment. The easier and more automatic you make your decisions, the more likely you’re going to be able to see them through.
Use your higher brain to plan ahead
“Some people spend their entire lives waiting for the time to be right to make an improvement.”
-James Clear
The idea:
- You want to stop eating cereal for breakfast
- You want to stop relying on sugar for your midday slump
- You want to journal 1x a week
The execution:
- Quit buying it
- Pick a lower carb lunch like tuna salad or boiled eggs with sliced cheddar that won’t tank your energy
- Pick a time, schedule it in, and set a reminder for that time slot
Take the question out of the equation- it’s automatic. We all love simplicity.
“When scientists analyze people who appear to have tremendous self-control, it turns out those individuals aren’t all that different from those who are struggling. Instead, ‘disciplined’ people are better at structuring their lives in a way that does not require heroic willpower and self-control.”
– James Clear
Read more about how to eliminate decision fatigue for good.
Comment below and tell me your current old habit that is giving you the hardest time. =
Best, Leana
Ps: Love all these James Clear quotes? You’ll love his book even more. I also have it listed on my resources page with all of my items that I use or recommend frequently.
Photo: Becky Simpson
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